‘I have to keep sending messages ?’
‘I’m really looking forward to our still being here when sending these things are a distant memory.’
‘Yes sir and all of us are as well.’
‘Hey, I have an idea. I’ll use the same one as the first time. Let’s see if anyone notices or cares. Could be a good gauge on how much longer we have to put up with them.’
‘Great idea sir ! I have the transcript from 2009 right here on the laptop. If I may sir, it might be a decent idea to rework at least part of it, “just because”.’
‘Definitely will do that. Thank you Jay. You’ve always had my back. I’m also confident we’ll be good to go using the first take, as I’ll have a nice and genuine smile, due to being filled with hope (for change) that this will be the last time I have to deal with them.’
‘Yes sir……… Ready whenever you are, sir.’
‘Okay then, I’ll call it……… 2012 Presidential Chanukah Message, Take One……… Here we go in five…… Four…… Three…………’
This Hanukkah season we remember the powerful story of the Maccabees who rose up to liberate their people from oppression. Upon discovering the desecration of their Temple, the believers found only enough oil to light the lamp for one night. And yet it lasted for eight.
Hanukkah is a time to celebrate the faith and customs of the Jewish people, but it is also an opportunity for people of all faiths to recognize the common aspirations we share. This holiday season, let us give thanks for the blessings we enjoy, and remain mindful of those who are suffering. And let us reaffirm our commitment to building a better, more complete world for all.
From our family to the Jewish Community around the world, Chag Sameach.
‘How was that ?’
‘Perfect sir……… and we’re done recording – systems off.’
‘Fantastic. I want an honest answer now Jay: Do you think they’ll buy it ? Will anybody notice it’s nearly the same as ’09 ? Let me read that older one so we can make sure everything is good for this year.’
‘Okay sir, let’s hear the 2009 message.’
The Hanukkah story of the Maccabees and the miracles they witnessed reminds us that faith and perseverance are powerful forces that can sustain us in difficult times and help us overcome even the greatest odds.
Hanukkah is not only a time to celebrate the faith and customs of the Jewish people, but for people of all faiths to celebrate the common aspirations we share.
As families, friends and neighbors gather together to kindle the lights, may Hanukkah’s lessons inspire us all to give thanks for the blessings we enjoy, to find light in times of darkness, and to work together for a brighter, more hopeful tomorrow.
‘It’s different enough that nobody will see it’s essentially the same thing and th…… Wait…… Sir, what are those last two words on this year’s message – Cod Sandwich ?!?’
‘Ha !…… That’s a good one Jay ! It’s “Chag Semeach” and I’m not sure what it means, but I heard that demon Bibi say it once when he and some people were staring at a plate of weird-looking food during one of their holidays. Everyone around him said the same thing in return, so I guess it’s something nice. I just let it fly in there at the end. Call it inspired.’
‘Nice touch sir. Maybe we should find out what it means in case you or I are asked at some point ?’
‘Naaaaah. Nobody’s gonna say a word and if they do, you know precisely what to tell them.’
‘Yes sir, “it’s Bush’s fault”.’
‘Do you think we should have the 2009 message scrubbed everywhere like we did with all those other matters ?’
‘No need sir. The only media who would care will soon be, as you say, “a distant memory”, plus there shouldn’t be any difficulties sir. Seventy-five percent of Jews firmly believe everything you say.’
‘What about the other twenty-five percent ?’
‘Does it matter sir ?…… Even the seventy-five percent ?’
‘Again Jay, you’re right. Thank you for keeping me straight. Now, all we have to really deal with are the few problems that somehow won’t go away, like the guy in South Florida you told me about and the other ones, especially the two in New York you call “that woman” and “him“, plus the guy in St. Louis who just had knee surgery and that gaggle of Star Wars freaks — They’re all getting way too close.’
‘Exactly sir and on that subject before I forget, Secretary Napolitano confirmed with Mr. Holdren that the “disposal systems” are all on schedule for completion at every site on or before the due dates.
Fantastic ! That just made this “meh” day a good one. Do we have time to get in eighteen ?’
‘Great, let’s go.’
It . Can’t . Happen . Here
Shema Yisroel Adnonai Elohenu, Adonai Echad.
Baruch Sheim K’vod Malchuto L’olam Va’ed.
Riding in memory of my dad, Roy Solomon, US Army, 63rd Engineers, WWII Europe.
In memory of my uncle, Col. E. J. Lasner, US Army, Europe, Viet Nam and USA.
In memory of my grandfather, Cpl. Samuel Lasner, US Army, WWI, France.
In memory of Brian A. Terry, US Marines, US Border Patrol.
Everything I need to know about Islam I learned at the age of 13 on September 5th 1972.
“The Genocide Of An American Presidency” — Thank you to Mr. Richard F. Wheeler for the title suggestion.